Geraint Roberts - Ramblings of a would-be published novelist

Estonian diary

Day 1: Travel. Pottered around the house, left late. Visited Bluebell railway and celebrated with a nice pub lunch and pint on the station platform, watching the E4 and Eddystone come in and out. Very pleasant. Got to Estonia, long day. We stayed in Kalli and Arvo's place, I needed the sleep. After the travel, I needed the shower!

Day 2: Gareth's look of amazement when he awoke to find me there was priceless. Arvo kindly took us south and we settled in the summerhouse - a small dwelling in the forest in mid Estonia. Where I can sit on a veranda and watch the huge garden of fruit and veg or the thunderstorms. Gareth has had fun here, he hardly stops running around. Evelin's bored, but then she can't resist cooling down in the local river. Ice cold and pure, a wonderful pick-me-up. i love this area, the way the storks nest on top of the telegraph poles. The way there's nothing around to bug me. the way the insects don't bite.

Day 3: We went to the beach, north of the resort of Parnu. Miles of sandy beach, really shallow sands that undulate, leaving you knee deep after 100m of freezing your privates off. Lovely day, Gareth can't stop running for the water. Thought I was the Piscean...

Day 4: Went to a health spa in Parnu. what a bizarre experience! We checked in and paid up front. The girl dutifully typed our details onto a database, gave us a card and told us to go to the 5th floor.
We went on the slowest lift in civilisation to a lady sat with a computer terminal. She took our card and dutifully entered all the details, manually on a sheet of paper. She then wrote out our card and told us to go to the Doctor on the 7Th floor. Off we traipsed and the Doctor looked at us and pushed us into choosing some treatments. Aile, Evelin and I got a massage. Aile and I chose a bubble bath (very relaxing) - separately! and some weird salt therapy. The Doctor noted these on our card and ... sent us to the third floor, to a lady who booked us in on a manual sheet, marked our cards and... exhausted and in need of a massage and bubble bath, we went to our rooms.

Day 5: Well, we enjoyed our stay, the free nosh and the quiet demeanour of Parnu, we decided to stay another day. First, Evelin and I were treated to a bizarre therapy. With plastic bags covering our heads, shoes and a plastic sleeved apron, we were off to sit in a strange room lined with salt crystals. Next I had a mud bath, and then my hands were treated to the delights of being dipped in molten paraffin wax. Hmmm.... we also had a day on the beach. the wind blew like buggery, but we still had fun. then back to the summerhouse

Day 6: A day lazing in the summerhouse. I could do with these. lovely day, almost got some writing done... Read Harry Potter. It's all about a boy magician, doncha know...

Day 7: Over to Aile's Dad in another forest, near rakvere. We surprised them. he was overjoyed and Gareth played up to everyone as always. Taught some bizarre therapies by his wife. She told me to lick the sign of a cross on his forehead three times and spit it out if he's got the heebeejeebees. She grabbed my head and demonstrated too before I could tell her I had just doused myself in insect repellent.... Great stuff that, gets rid of all bugs, except the Estonian ones. I have bites to play with now.

Day 8: Back to summerhouse. And a welcome swim in the river. we needed it, we felt grimy.

day9: To Kalli and Arvo's. Evelin went shopping. Arvo came back and went to sleep. Gareth dutifully trashed their kettle. They keep it on a hob and Gareth has found that if you turn knobs, they go round. What fun... Well 20 mins of open windows and Arvo and I scraping molten plastic off the worktop. Kalli now has the cleanest kitchen in Christendom. I have a £65 kettle to replace.
Watched Estonia beat Andorra 2-1. An understated score, if Estonia did not insist on playing 7 midfielders and 5 defenders, whilst Andorra. Imagine a mildly adequate Sunday pub team. Well, no... imagine a Sunday pub team. Shocking! England only scored two, as the mountain boys were interested in kicking lumps out of their peers or falling dramatically at their feet. Estonia's last kick of the game produced the winner, it was the one time someone took on a man. he took on 3, slotted a wonderful cross and bang. In the net. The scorer was so pleased he was sent off for celebrating. Pit the ref hadn't noticed the preceding theatricals. What a sport, hey?

day 10: Off kettle shopping, invested in a few other things like a game, a book... Evelin went off and blew the rest of the budget. That bodes ill for the future...

Day 11: Went shopping for food. Ended up with a suitcase full of black bread, cheese and some pungent dried fish that beer drinkers like - sort of Estonian maritime pork scratchings, I guess...

Day 12: Went home. Gareth spent 150 mins of a 3 hour flight flirting with all the blond women. he spent the rest asleep. Bliss! The journey was long, but not dramatic. The whole door to door was 12 hours before we stepped back in and sank gratefully to our beds.

Bank Holiday: Did absolutely sod all. Marvellous!

posted by Geraint @ 9:58 pm